We nearly had the shocker of a season on Monday night's Nashville Star, but unfortunately, Billy Ray Cyrus wasn't fired on live TV.

John Rich was.

By the singer he was mentoring, that is. However, that was only one nanobit of drama on a show that has spiraled out of control into turddom.

It was a double-elimination week, and Tommy Stanley was booted before even getting a shot to sing. However, it gave Billy Ray the chance to prove he can read at a 4th grade level from a prompter, reminding the world that he wrote "Some Gave All" in honor of military men like Tommy.

Sorry. It's pandering.

There was no musical theme this week, but like I noted before, there was drama. Besides Shawn Mayer's decision to fire Rich and utilize the mentoring services of Jeffrey Steele, the duo of Laura and Sophie argued and cried like teenage girls before Rich told them on live TV they should just go home.

Mayer sang "The First Cut Is The Deepest," and the duo sang "Walking After Midnight," and in my humble opinion, they both should be going home. I gave them both a turd, er, c minus.

However, they weren't the turdiest of the night. That honor goes to Coffey, the non-country act who can neither sing country nor sing anything. His version of "Proud Mary" was beyond terrible, particularly when his sheep-like vibrato kicks in.

Ashlee Hewitt was almost a casualty (bottom two and, ergo, our possible shocker), and I think we're in dire need of seeing some songwriting ability, which Ashlee apparently has, as one commenter posted a few weeks ago. Why? Because the singing isn't doing it for me.

Hewitt's version of Steve Miller's "Take The Money And Run" was soulless. Furthermore, she doesn't have a very good voice. She's cute, perky, can play the guitar and has some potential vocally, but her strengths are all in the marketing aspect of what it takes to be a country star.

On the other hand, Gabe Garcia is nearly the real deal. Vocally and stylistically, he's the best on the show relative to country. Some might argue that Melissa Lawson's brand of "pop country" would suffice, and it's a valid contention. Personally, I prefer country, meaning I liked Garcia's version of "Somebody Like You" from Keith Urban.

Gabe's primary problem is that he's stiffer than Heath Ledger. (Too soon?)

And that leads me to Lawson, who again did a respectable job with a non-country song, "Danny's Song" from Loggins and Messina. She'll appeal to a big chunk of the country crowd, and as I noted with Hewitt, it's time to see if she can write. Trisha Yearwood, to whom I compare Melissa, can write.

Same goes for Gabe. A Nashville Star has to be able to write, and my vote goes to the singer who can prove his or her compositional abilities. My gut hunch, based on what I've read, is that Ashlee can already out-write them both.

Last but not least, Pearl Heart tortured the country with some more hideous three-part harmony (FYI: Somebody really needs to introduce these chicks to a tape of the group Take 6 from back in the day to show them how harmonies are done.) and were promptly praised by our tone-deaf judges.

But before America could be influenced wrongly, the trio was kicked to the curb.

It makes me uncomfortable to be almost downright mean, but Nashville Star had been a reputable show for five seasons before the move to NBC. And at least some of the blame has to be put on the turdalicious "talent."

I'm just about done with Hewitt, particularly vocally, and I'm still waiting to see whether Gabe or Melissa can write a country song. My gut hunch says this is your final three, and I give Melissa a slight edge.